"There's such a lot of different Annes in me. I sometimes think that is why I'm such a troublesome person. If I was just the one Anne it would be ever so much more comfortable, but then it wouldn't be half so interesting."

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

out n about in Coffs Harbour

While we were at Dorrigo - I started to put some hand cream on and noticed that my wedding ring was missing - then I realized that I had left it on the bedside table back in the Bendemeer Pub - I was distraught - bursting into tears. Joe of course was so comforting saying we could get another one if we didn't get it back - but I was so upset, saying that this ring had been through alot with me - the birth of our child, the death of my dad, the cancer treatments and many more. So a quick phone call to the publican and it was found - they are sending it by mail back to me.
We arrived and settled into our room and the phone rang - our bank was questioning purchases that had been made over the past week on our business card. It had gone over the limit! We assured them we were nowhere near the area that it had been used and that our credit card had been skimmed somewhere while purchasing petrol and the scum bags had a party - spending over $20,000 in a week. So now the fraud squad is involved. Thankfully our bank will be refunding all the money.
after that fiasco - we had a cup of tea and a little siesta.
The next few days were spent with friends, just cruising around. On Saturday morning we had to muster at the local football field for the grand parade - what an absolutely amazing experience that was - over 4000 bikes riding through the town. The streets were lined by locals, waving flags - they even had the elderly from nursing homes, out in their wheel chairs ~ to sit and watch. So I sat on the back waving like the Queen!

I asked Joe to take a photo of my leather jacket - my hair is no where near that colour - it must have been the sun shining on all that chrome - reflecting onto my hair.

below is a photo I took of a guy on his bike - I thought he looked pretty cool.

and you have to laugh - my daughters think I am going through some mid-life crisis. When I saw air brush tatoos - I decided to get one - and messaged Sophie, telling her I had just had a rose tatooed onto my arm. A few seconds later, she called and asked me what the hell I was doing. To which I replied - ' hey, that's nothing, Dad had his nipple piereced' ....

(he didn't really) but her reaction was hilarious !!!!!

the tatoo washed - off after much scrubbing - I am not really a tat girl.

although I do have my radiation tatoos - three tiny dots - that absolutely killed when they were done... so that turned me off for life.

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

on the way up

what an adventure! 1400 klms on the back of a bike - a Harley, no less - cruising some of the most picturesque areas of our country.
we left at the 6.30 am on Thursday - the day winter started for us - a cold 5 deg C. A heavy, heavy frost. Up through the Putty Valley where the sun never hits during winter - me hanging on for grim death hoping that there was no black ice on the road. I had angels at each corner of the bike. Bill the guy we were travelling with is in his '60's and what a maniac. He left us for dead. I am grateful that Joe is a safe rider and keeps to the speed limits.... up hill and down dale we went - til I tapped him on the shoulder and said it was time for a break. I was absolutely freezing ~ even though I had thermals on, two pairs of socks and multiple scarves. It was damn cold. When I hopped off my feet felt like blocks of ice.... continuing on until it was morning tea time.. a quick cup of hot coffee and some toast and off again... we tried to stop about every hour and a half just to stretch. Lunch was at a pub in Tamworth - Joe and I shared fish n chips.. as we were leaving, an old man came up to me and told me that I looked stunning on the back of the bike, then he continued on to tell me of how his dear departed wife and himself were bikers back 'then'. I felt so sorry for him, they had been married 35 years and she had died a year or so ago. He was lost - as we rode out, he blew kisses and yelled out - *I love you all* (I think he may have been having a little tipple in the pub). Around 4pm, we arrived at Bendemeer Hotel where we were spending the first night. We went to book in and found there had been a mistake made - we only had one room between the 3 of us ! hmmmmm - I was not impressed but I was told by the barmaid to 'take it or leave it, luv' - so I took it and we spent the night in the same room as Bill.....after dinner the boys had a quick game of pool - lord, my mother would die if she knew what I was up to!

Up for breakfast - the temp was below freezing - minus 4 deg. C - thank heavens the bikes were locked in a shed.... bacon & eggs for breakfast and off we went. It was cold but warmed up quite quickly as we were travelling north. The road from the New England area across to the coast is gorgeous - rainforest. Unfortunately, I haven't yet mastered the art of taking pictures from the back of the bike as we ride along, so no pictures of when we were travelling... but here is a link to a town called Dorrigo where we had morning tea.
then we continued on to Coffs Harbour - arriving just before lunch.
At this rally there were over 6,000 people and 4,000 bikes registered. The Ulysses group was formed about 25 years ago by 3 australian men over 50, who just wanted to ride for enjoyment. Their motto is "Grow Old Disgracefully" ~ I was amazed and touched by the camaraderie among all of these people - they said hello to us, they waved as we rode in and always a nod as we passed on the road....there is so much more to tell and I will continue tomorrow but here are some photos to show just how many bikes there were!

the photos above and below were taken from a crane that Joe went up in while we were waiting to go in the grand parade! These guys aren't an out-law motorcycle group - just a bunch of old men & women who love to ride

below is a snap I took from the ground - everywhere I turned it was like this. We went for a walk and ended up losing our bike for quite a few minutes - very easy to do in a crowd like this

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

off we go into the wild blue yonder

yes, Joe & I are off riding for a few days - there is a Ulysses convention up on the north coast of New South Wales in a town called Coffs Harbour.
Originally, Joe was riding up by himself ~ I was going to stay at home with Sophie but have decided to go - on the back of the bike! I admit to suffering separation anxiety when Joe and I are apart.
That and also coming up on June 1st is my yearly oncology checkup - that always puts me into a spin. I woke during the night crying - after a horrid dream of re-living the whole cancer story of mine. It is something that happens periodically, I have learnt to deal with it best I can and that is all I can do.

this is our new bike - a Harley Davidson Road King - we bought it a few weeks back!

I would like also to thank those of you who have continued to comment here while I go through my reflective period - I know it has been a one-sided blogging friendship lately and I am truly sorry.. I have been having email discussions with a very, very good friend who has helped me tremendously and when I feel I can share - I will post the story.
so with that, as well as this on-line course with Starhawk, I have been going through a period of change, so to speak....

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

I am a godmother!!!

yes - Diva gave birth while I was asleep last night:

it's a boy! well, two actually

Peggy was one of the first bloggers that I had contact with - when I discovered her, I fell in love with her lifestyle and her charm. I count Peggy as one of my best online friends. Then she got Diva - and I fell in love. her antics make me laugh - being a Capricorn, I feel a certain affinity with Diva and now she is a mum.
Congratulation to Peggy & Diva (and Nitro of course) !!

Friday, May 18, 2007

global warming is not a myth

for Mothers Day, Joe gave me a subscription to the Diggers Club of Australia - a club for gardeners that "aims to provide the best seeds, plants products and advice that the environmentally aware gardener could need". They specialize in heirloom vegetables and unimproved flowers.
They have a terrific website and many, many articles on environmental issues. here is a link to those articles - articles which will open your eyes to just how bad the state of our earth is and how much we need and can do to help.


Thursday, May 17, 2007

the stillness of this new moon

so weird. this morning while I was outside, I noticed a stillness. a quietness - it is like the moon is resting and the earth along with it. Oh the birds were singing, the washing machine was going, clothes hanging in the sun, traffic noise in the background. BUT it was quiet. I found it quite comforting actually - like our earth was resting along with the moon, getting energy to cope with all that is happening out there. today I am cleaning and as I do, I am burning the samhain incense that Daisy sent me - with this stillness, it still feels like Samhain to me
I took a few dark moon photos of my garden and I believe that you can even sense the resting of the moon in them...

see how all the leaves are now falling - but, how odd is it that my gardenias are still blooming at this time of year - curiouser & curiouser.....

even the peace flags are still & notice all the leaves under my apple tree - I will rake these up over the weekend and put into my compost.....and even my vegie garden below is in resting mode - I am getting it ready to plant beetroot, onions and potatoes.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

we all need to ground ourselves

there is much going on before this dark moon - people are feeling really odd. Moonstones aren't even doing it for me right now. I have them beside my bed, a moonstone pyramid under my bed. I have my black obsidian and I am wearing my moonstone pendant. seems to me that I need more.

I think we need to do a grounding. You can do this inside but it is so much better if you can kick your shoes off and be really connected to earth.

*take your time doing this grounding meditation... there is no rush...
stand somewhere that you feel is a sacred space for you and close your eyes - loosen yourself up & be totally relaxed.*
Imagine the trunk of your body is that of a tree - with roots growing from your feet - deep into the earth. Through all the root fibres of other plants, through crystals, rocks and stones. seeking out pockets to grip into. wrapping around those rocks and crystals. gathering energy and grounding as you go. going deep down through all layers of time - until you come to the heart of our earth - the core. Rest in the warmth of this molten heart & feel connected to all that is . Now bring that energy back up - back through all the layers of time - bring with you that connectedness, that grounding. Right back up through your trunk to the crown of your head and out through the space where your head was open at birth - spilling down over your body, like branches of a tree. stay with this for as long as you need. When you are ready, kneel down and touch the ground with your hands.... earthing yourself. Open your eyes and breath.

I do this quite often. when I feel ditzy and spaced out. it gives me a grounded-ness.
let's hope it works this time!

the dark moon this month

oh boy, as I have said before - this dark moon is affecting me more than ever. the past few months haven't been so bad I think that is because I was on a course of tissue salts following the moon's cycle - however, I forgot to keep it going and maybe this is why I am stumbling & reflective. I am not depressed nor am I melancholy and I do have alot to say - I just can't get it out - like whispers of fog that I just can't grasp.

the new moon for us down here, is Thursday 16th May at 5.35am. I cannot wait!

thankfully I have a few online friends who understand completely and they have been counselling me through it ~ as one of these friends said

"Sit tight...this will pass, like it has before. Each time, you emerge with a new take on things, don't fight it..let it happen."

yes, I will take that, looking back, it makes alot of sense to me -

so everybody - sit tight, by Friday I should be on my way to being normal.

Monday, May 14, 2007

where do I go from here?

I wonder. the dark moon coming up has made me go inside myself more than usual. I am withdrawing and it worries me. I am NOT depressed. I wonder where I go from here with my blogging. I wonder where I go with my 'spiritual journey'. It is like I am at that point again of which road to take.
I feel so much more settled since finding my Cornish roots - I feel a true connection but since starting the Earth as healer course with Starhawk, I have become more questioning of my life. It worries me that most of my friends are on-line. I don't have friends in the real world that I talk to like I 'talk' to those friends online. I have Joe, my partner who is my best friend and I am very, very fortunate in that. But it worries me that I am putting all my eggs in one basket so to speak. I do not mind my own company at all, at least I know what I am talking about. I love to be by myself in the garden, knowing my ancestors are there with me - but they are not 'there' to hug me or to reply to my questions.
my blogging has changed so many times and I feel in my soul that right now, I am standing at a crossroads with it - which way to take? I do not want to get caught up in it all again like I have done. I do not want to get caught up in the frenzy of swaps or give-aways. I made my blog private -invitation only because I had many people reading and never commenting, it is NOT the comments that concern me. It is more - why do they read and not comment, ever? Would they come and sit in my home, watching my daily life and not talk? it kind of freaked me out a little.
I have a wonderful life here in my little corner of the world - a place that I want to share with those who I care about and can call a good friend. I want to read about how your days are, see your area where you live and read about how you are feeling.
I want to show you what it is like to live on the other side of the world (for some anyhow) ... so bear/bare? (never know which one) with me for a while til I sort it all out.

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

where have you been?

"Oh, where have you been, my blue-eyed son? Oh, where have you been, my darling young one?"

~I've stumbled on the side of twelve misty mountains, I've walked and I've crawled on six crooked highways, I've stepped in the middle of seven sad forests, I've been out in front of a dozen dead oceans, I've been ten thousand miles in the mouth of a graveyard, And it's a hard, and it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard, And it's a hard rain's a-gonna fall.~


well, not quite - but I have been contemplating the world - taking part in this course with Starhawk has made me realize just how fragile our world is & how much we need to do to help heal it.
I have been wondering where I am going with blogging

I have been researching composting methods and permaculture
and I have been in my garden.
I have been suffering hayfever after mixing 4 bales of lucerne and 2 bales of straw to use as mulch on my garden.
I have been mixing vegimite, malt and water to put into empty lemonade bottles to capture fruit fly
& I have been snuggling.

this is taken from my lavender garden - looking towards the front of my home

The moon is waning and I am going inward.

For some reason I don't have alot to say.

Yesterday I was in the garden for a few hours. I am feeling very connected to the earth these days which is good for me.

I was weeding and looking at my Feverfew & I noticed, about 6 ins in front of my face, a hoverfly - just hovering right in front of me. I saw its face! And its eyes - like it was actually saying hello to me. It hovered for quite a few mins, I stood still and just watched - it could have been a faery in disguise.

Now, THAT - was an amazing experience.

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

the month of Mary

on the catholic calendar, May is supposedly the month of Mary. And even though I don't consider myself a 'christian' in the real term - I do have a strong devotion to Mary..... gee, I don't really know what I am in terms of religion - I was baptised a Church of England, did one year with the seventh day adventists when I was 12. Confirmed into the catholic church at the age of 33 - tried buddhism and many other ways of 'believing' - have been a 'witch' all my life without knowing it....

as usual, I get off the subject - during May, I like to honour Mary - with roses - a bunch picked from my garden in front of one of my vintage statues....

this month I also hope to build a shrine outside in my garden - much like the one in Under the Tuscan sun. a place where I can go and put flowers whenever I need some extra *help*.

and did you know that lady beetles/bugs are really 'our lady's bugs'? tis true!

"In the olden days, British farmers prayed to the Virgin Mary for help with their crops. Then ladybugs arrived and helped the farmers by eating crop-eating bugs and saved farmers' crops. In honor of these bugs, the farmers called the beetles "Our Lady's beetle," which turned into ladybug."